One of the most disturbing trends in romance/erotica to me, is abduction. Not the role playing between consenting adults either.
To be honest, I haven’t actually been able to finish one of these stories. They are so fucked up. They seem to be popping up more and more in paranormal romances. I’m not sure how often this theme shows up in other genres.
The theme goes like this:
Woman is abducted, forcefully taken somewhere against her will.
The abductor, whether he’s done the deed himself or hired someone, is in need of a mate and can only accomplish this by stealing a woman.
The woman is scared/angry and not having any of it, at first.
Then by magical means, drugs/spells/potions, mind control or simply wearing her down with his extremely hot body & non stop advances, she falls madly in love with him/his unbelievable hotness.
I have such a hard time with this being a thing being sold to women as hot romance.
You were abducted? Who fucking cares, the dude is hot and has an epic dick. Still not into? We have ways around that. Drugs and/or mind control will loosen that pussy right up. Seriously, he’s really a nice guy with super cock. Everyone knows, a guy can do anything he wants to a woman if he has a super cock. Even if it’s only super in his own mind.
Let’s be clear on what these stories are saying.
It’s ok if he’s been mean to you, taken you against your will, drugs and manipulates you, and cut you off from your family and friends. This is hot, sexy, and the only way you’ll find love, loser.
This ‘harmless’ bit of fantasy, grooms us and prepares us for abuse in real life. It teaches us that this is what it is to be desired and loved. It reinforces negative gender roles.
One of the reasons women read romance and erotica is for the fantasy of a perfect man. What does that say about us and our society when that perfect man is an abuser wrapped up as hot sex machine?
Is it ok for your man to drug you if he fucks your brains out afterward?
Is it ok that he cuts you off from family and friends if he eats pussy like a god?
What if he hits you?
What about the moment he goes too far and you end up dead? That’s what love is right?
In fiction these abductors always turn out to be great guys that just had some bad luck meeting women or are also being forced against their will to follow tradition. It’s a nice cop out. It let’s them off the hook for their abusive behavior.
You know we’re not supposed to hold abusers responsible for their actions, right? (WRONG!) It let’s them be abuser & savior at the same time. Win for asshole dudes everywhere!