Nothing says sexy like human trafficking

Posted Leave a commentPosted in Romantic Fictions

One of the most disturbing trends in romance/erotica to me, is abduction. Not the role playing between consenting adults either.

To be honest, I haven’t actually been able to finish one of these stories. They are so fucked up. They seem to be popping up more and more in paranormal romances. I’m not sure how often this theme shows up in other genres.

The theme goes like this:

Woman is abducted, forcefully taken somewhere against her will.

The abductor, whether he’s done the deed himself or hired someone, is in need of a mate and can only accomplish this by stealing a woman.

The woman is scared/angry and not having any of it, at first.

Then by magical means, drugs/spells/potions, mind control or simply wearing her down with his extremely hot body & non stop advances, she falls madly in love with him/his unbelievable hotness.

I have such a hard time with this being a thing being sold to women as hot romance.

You were abducted? Who fucking cares, the dude is hot and has an epic dick. Still not into? We have ways around that. Drugs and/or mind control will loosen that pussy right up. Seriously, he’s really a nice guy with super cock. Everyone knows, a guy can do anything he wants to a woman if he has a super cock. Even if it’s only super in his own mind. 

Let’s be clear on what these stories are saying.

It’s ok if he’s been mean to you, taken you against your will, drugs and manipulates you, and cut you off from your family and friends. This is hot, sexy, and the only way you’ll find love, loser.

This ‘harmless’ bit of fantasy, grooms us and prepares us for abuse in real life. It teaches us that this is what it is to be desired and loved. It reinforces negative gender roles.

One of the reasons women read romance and erotica is for the fantasy of a perfect man. What does that say about us and our society when that perfect man is an abuser wrapped up as hot sex machine?

Is it ok for your man to drug you if he fucks your brains out afterward?

Is it ok that he cuts you off from family and friends if he eats pussy like a god?

What if he hits you?

What about the moment he goes too far and you end up dead? That’s what love is right?

In fiction these abductors always turn out to be great guys that just had some bad luck meeting women or are also being forced against their will to follow tradition. It’s a nice cop out. It let’s them off the hook for their abusive behavior.

You know we’re not supposed to hold abusers responsible for their actions, right? (WRONG!) It let’s them be abuser & savior at the same time. Win for asshole dudes everywhere!

 

Love Bites: Physically harming to mark women as property

Posted Leave a commentPosted in Romantic Fictions

There is a lot of biting going on in romance/erotica. Mainly in werewolf/vampire stories. It’s not what I would call ‘fun biting’ either. It’s a nip that brands the women in these stories as property of the men.

The idea of being owned as a piece of property is really disturbing to me and not at all romantic or sexy.

The women are usually forced into being bitten/claimed/owned by some life threatening or awful circumstance. She may agree to the biting, but it is a decision made under duress when she is given very little choice. Women being put in positions where we are forced to go along with what a man wants out of fear isn’t a hot fantasy. It is reality. A reality in which a woman can be seriously harmed by men for not going along with their wants. When it shows up in romantic fiction it helps to normalize men’s harmful behaviors.

The men doing the biting are portrayed as the nice/good guy, doing all he can to save the damsel in distress. In many stories the events that lead to the biting are the result of his own actions.

His asshat or careless behavior has contributed to what is going on, but the woman is the paying the price. She is a pawn in whatever family/clan/gang/whatever bullshit he has going on.

These stories reinforce the patriarchal teachings that women are property of men, that we have no choices of our own, that we as ‘good girls’ must let the men handle things in whatever way they see fit.

We are props in their lives. Tools for them to use.

Sometimes, the women choose to be claimed in the heat of passion, usually without a full understanding of what being owned entails. She gives into her body’s desires and forgets to use her brain. We all know that when a hot guy is horny for you, no matter how big of a jerk he is, your body wants him and you have no choice but to go with it. Right? Sex doesn’t equal ownership. Let me repeat that, having sex with someone doesn’t mean they own you or have any claim over you.

This is another sneaky way we are taught to not listen to our better judgment. If a man is good looking, how big of an asshole he is doesn’t matter. Maybe there is something ‘wrong’ with the woman. Like she is ‘curvy’ or has opinions. If you are anything other than the standard of perfection, you should be thankful that this totally fly jack wagon is paying any attention to you at all.

Our idea of what is romantic and sexy is twisted. I’m not talking about people who love being bitten or being the ones doing the biting during sex. The biting going on in these stories isn’t about pleasure. It’s about keeping women in their place.

It’s fantasy being used to keep us chained to a reality where women are disposable pieces of property.